2012 February

The Best Thing You Can Do Today

Inside the hundred year old house, we have ourselves a grown-up girl slumber party. We talk late into the night about marriage, parenting, the good and hard around both. So many places to go wrong, so many prayers for God to make right. I laugh to myself thinking old or young, some things for girls don’t change: We still want to share our secrets.

I sit on the sofa with legs folded beside me. I sip my drink and wonder what makes me so willing to spill the deep-down fears out all messy-like in front of a few while remaining quiet in front of most. Oh sure, pride can make me want to project an image of having it all together more than I do. But if you’re a regular ’round these parts, you know I’m just not into presenting a shiny, photoshopped version of myself. I try to balance sharing my junk without oversharing the inappropriate. Discernment is a good thing.

But how do I discern who visits the interiors of my life and who doesn’t? I read Jesus’ prayer in John, and I think it gives the answer,

Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory…”

John 17:24

Those who sit with me where I am are those who hear my secrets. They don’t act like they are ahead of little ol’ me while rolling their eyes and tapping their self-righteous little toe. They don’t act like they are behind me by making it all about them or allowing my stuff to make them feel small. They sit smack-dab next to me, holding my hand while encouraging my heart.

And when this happens, they have my trust.

Jesus wants us with Him where He is, wherever He asks us to go. God places people in our lives then asks us to meet them where they are. To love them right where they are, not where I wish they were. May I do this better everyday, sit beside those and listen to their secrets. And may the glory of Jesus shine through the sharing and the trusting.

February 27, 2012 12 Comments Filed Under: Encouragement, Faith in Action, Family, Friendship

Because You’re Already Amazing

By Kristen

My Faith and I don’t talk too much during our mother~daughter date to the Four Continents Figure Skating Championship. The magic of it all leaves us spellbound. I mean, these skaters move powerfully but gracefully on ice. The men lift and throw the women, they all jump and spin on skinny blades on ice. Amazing, really.

One pair {from Canada, I think?} struck me not because of how perfectly they skated or how well they placed. My untrained eye noticed mistakes and she fell twice. But as they released their final pose, I looked up at the huge television screens just in time to see her turn and whisper “I’m sorry” to him. I couldn’t make out his reply, but by the way he smiled so warm while hugging her so tight, he believed there was nothing to forgive.

She was already amazing, and a couple of falls didn’t make that less true. If she’d nailed every element to sheer perfection, she wouldn’t have been more amazing. She would have had a better performance, but the heart of her identity wouldn’t be any different.

It’s the same with you, ya know. And me. We don’t have to be more, do more, or have more to be amazing. And if there’s one woman who knows a thing or twenty about this, it’s Holley Gerth. Or as I like to call her, “every woman’s sister.”

Meet Holley’s brand spankin’ new book baby, You’re Already Amazing: Embracing Who You Are, Becoming All God Created You to Be. Isn’t she just beautiful?

You're Already Amazing: Embracing Who You Are, Becoming All God Created You to Be

When I say Holley is every woman’s sister, I mean she loves and encourages from a place in her heart that shines Jesus like an effervescent lightbulb. You can’t help but want to be her sister. Or her BFF. Or her SBFF {Sister BFF}. She *is* God-inspired encouragement, and her words breathe fresh air in your life.

Today, You’re Already Amazing is available for pre-order at Barnes & Noble for half-price! And hello! While her book isn’t even out yet {due to release next month} it’s already #1 at the Barnes & Noble site! Glory be! {What a great Easter or Mother’s Day gift this book would be!}

May your day {and your weekend} be amazing, darlings. Not because of all you do, but because of Christ who lives in you. Perfect double axles or not, your identity is safe in Him.

February 16, 2012 5 Comments Filed Under: Authors Extraordinaire

The Hard Work of Love and Marriage

By Kristen

I answer the knock on the practice room door in the basement of the music building, and I assume it’s someone wanting to use the room. I’m already talking about how I’m almost done as I swing open the heavy door. My eyes turn silver dollar size as I meet a sea of pink, pink roses spun in green and silver wrapping paper. I look up at the deep brown smiling eyes behind them and can’t help but fall into them, those eyes that make me smile and blush. It’s February 15th, so I don’t expect flowers. Not that I expected them on Valentine’s Day, either.

I stumble out a surprised thank you, but he just cocks his head sideways and shrugs.

“I heard you tell your friend yesterday that you didn’t get anything for Valentine’s Day. I wanted to fix that.”

I notice the roses aren’t from the store, and he later mentions he got them from his grandmother’s house. I don’t think about how she grows roses in February. I don’t care. Because even though I’m awkward as a 3 dollar bill and scared of my own shadow, he notices me. He didn’t overlook what he overheard.

Nineteen years later and he still notices the things that matter.

Oh, you can be sure I notice things, alright. I notice thick combat boot socks laying on the bedroom floor. And dirty dishes by the sink, even though our kitchen is weird and has one of those newfangled dishwashers right. next. to. the. sink. And I cannot tell a lie: those dishes in the sink annoy me. As do the socks on the floor. I sigh too loud and grumble too long.

When it comes to walking with God, there is no such thing as instant maturity. God doesn’t mass produce His saints. He hand tools each one, and it always takes longer than we expected.

Charles Swindoll

I hate complaining about stuff that really doesn’t amount to a hill of beans. But, I still do it. Could dirty socks on the floors and cups by the sink be God’s hammer and chisel used to slowly, deliberately scrape away my heart’s hard parts? Opportunities to practice grace? To live it out? It makes sense because He cares infinitely more about a clean heart than a clean house. And when I get to heaven’s gates, it’s the state of my heart that will be under examination, not the state of my house.

When I pick up the laundry and put away the dishes, I let grace work like a broom and sweep the offense out the back door of my mind. Oh, it doesn’t feel good at first. Chiseling hurts and it takes time. But I hear Jesus ask, “Will you let this harden or help you?” and I am encouraged to trade what feels good in the moment for what moves me towards maturity.

Every marriage faces bigger issues that shouldn’t be swept away but brought into noonday light and stared at and talked out. Every marriage has to do the hard examinations. May I notice the important and allow God’s tools to fashion an inspired likeness of marriage built on a foundation of grace.

February 15, 2012 9 Comments Filed Under: Encouragement, Faith in Action, Marriage

When You Need to Know You Belong

By Kristen

Did I ever tell y’all I was Miss Arkansas 1991? It’s true.

Well, sorta.

Actually, I was Miss Arkansas band camp.

Not quite the same, I suppose? Well, you already know I play oboe, so my I’m-just-a-big-nerd-and-always-have-been secret isn’t really a secret, now is it.

In high school, we band kids knew all the band-geek jokes and where we fell on the popularity totem pole. We couldn’t have cared less, and you know why? Because we belonged, and band was our catalyst for belonging. We were individual as snowflakes, but we shared a common interest and built a little community around it. I’ve seen the same thing in school classrooms, sports teams, and military squadrons. The team spirit sparks genuine camaraderie and friendships, and there’s no denying the sense of belonging felt by its members.

Since getting married, I’ve lived in ten neighborhoods across five states {and one ocean}. Not that many for a military family, but enough to see all kinds of friendship seasons. Sometimes friendships formed quickly, sometimes they took their sweet time. When I’ve been blessed to have close-knit community, there’s no doubt the sense of belonging makes my soul sing.

I want that same sense of belonging in my map dot home of Colorado Springs. I bet many of you want this in your neck of the woods, too. Do you know who else wants this for you? The folks of (in)courage. This is why they are pouring their heart and soul into something called (in)RL.

What is (in)RL? First of all, it’s short for in real life. (in)courage thrives on building relationships that bless you in your day to day, and they want (in)RL to be the catalyst that sparks new friendships in your own zip codes. So, in an effort to encourage us to form near and dear friendships, (in)courage dreamt up (in)RL. Think of it as one giant excuse to get together {and gab} and hang out {without worrying about our hang-ups}.

If you want to take part in this global meet-up on a local scale, you have two options:

1. Host a meet-up in your home, at Starbucks, or wherever suits your fancy.

2. Attend a meet-up that is already happening in your area.

There is a $10 registration fee that includes a T-shirt and Simply Marvelous card pack. {FYI ~ (in)RL is not a money-making venture for DaySpring. The registration fee simply covers the price of those two items.} A community keynote will kick off Friday night, and then Saturday will be the get-together part. There will be additional videos available for viewing if you or your host so desires.

If you’re a visual learner like me and want more insight into this whole crazy-beautiful notion, peek at the videos below. They feature several of the (in)courage writers {including yours truly in the second one}.

For more enlightenment into (in)RL, *please* read Deidra’s article from yesterday and Jessica’s tomorrow. Both these darling women are master encouragers and write tenderly and eloquently about friendships and community.

If you’ve visited here for 5 minutes, you know I get how hard it can be to make friends. It feels messy and tricky. But maybe – just maybe – (in)RL could be the catalyst that removes these scary parts so your heart feels free to connect with new folks.

I love you ladies so much. If you live in the Colorado Springs vicinity, please stop by my own meet-up! And in the comments below, feel free to ask more questions about (in)RL. I’ll do my best to answer {although you may find some of them answered in this Q and A about (in)RL }. Also, what do you find to be the most difficult thing about forming new friendships? The most difficult thing about maintaining established friendships?