Military

Love Thy Military {or Civilian} Neighbor

To my fellow military spouses: Happy Military Spouse Appreciation Day! Thanks to all of you who serve and sacrifice quietly in the shadows. You may not feel like it, but you are brave heroes, warrior world-changers, and tender heart-holders. You are my family away from family, and I love you.

{I’m working on a surprise for you that will be available at the end of the month. Stay tuned!}

If you find yourself living in the same neighborhood as a military family, maybe today is a good day to shower some extra love on them? Below are a few ideas that are never expected but always appreciated.

And really, these are good ways to love on any neighbor, military or civilian.

{Download a free printable of this from my original post.}

1. Ask her over for dinner. Being the only grown-up in a house gets lonely, so hanging with other adults is nice. If your schedule permits, make it routine {i.e. Invite her for dinner every Sunday or coffee every Tuesday}. FYI: she’ll be focusing on your company, not your house.

2. Bring dinner to her house. Even just a casserole she can put in the freezer is so helpful and awesome.

3. Offer her your contact information. Give her permission to call or email you if she needs something.

4. Grocery shop. If you’re making a grocery or Target run, ask her if she needs anything.

5. Take out the trash. If her trash and/or recycle receptacles are outside, take them to the curb for her.

6. Offer to babysit. Be specific. If she knows you well, offer to take her kids with you on a playdate. It doesn’t have to be for long. Just having an hour or two to exhale on her own feels like a Christmas miracle.

7. Bring over a plate of cookies. Attach a note with the names of your family members and contact information. The baked goods don’t have to be homemade. {Sometimes I buy these instead.} She is just moved by the gesture.

8. Help with home improvement. Many spouses have the urge to do house projects while on the home front. So much of the military lifestyle is out of their control, so home improvement projects help them feel in control. Help her paint a room or pick out curtains. {I picked up a drill for the first time and helped a friend with a deployed husband install bathroom tile.} Even something as simple as helping her pick up/change lightbulbs is appreciated.

9. Swap movies, books, and magazines. Let her borrow your Netflix movies and return them for you.

10. Bring her a Starbucks treat just because. It’s more about showing up and checking in than about the treat.

11. Send her a card. It’s easy for military spouses to feel ignored, so this always makes her day. Also, DaySpring has some lovely e-card options.

12. Invite her to participate in things. Even if she can’t make it the first few times, don’t quit asking.

13. Refer her to your people. If you have a hair dresser or a dentist you like, ask her if she would like their name(s). My neighbors are often the best source for where to go to get what done.

14. Give her the gift of green. Potted flowers in the summer, stems from the grocery in the winter. They brighten her home and her mood.

15. Encourage her. Look for something specific she’s doing well and brag on her to her face.

16. Give her yard a helping hand. Mow or edge her lawn.

17. Remember her birthday. Surprise her with a card or a piece of cake.

18. Remember her on holidays. Give her a card for Mother’s Day. Invite her over for Thanksgiving dinner.

19. Follow through. If you tell her you’ll do something for her, be a woman of your word.

20. Pray for her strength, her marriage, her kids. It is the least and the most you can do.

What would you add to the list?

May 10, 2013 7 Comments Filed Under: Being a Woman, Friendship, Military

One Thing That Makes All the Difference Wherever You Are

By Kristen

I carefully led my toddler boys to an empty square of grass on the patchwork of moms and tiny children, content to sit for as long as my boys would let me. The local Easter egg hunt had been a raving success, so James and Ethan were anxious to explore every bit of their booty. The air wasn’t too chilly, but I wrapped my jacket around me tighter anyway. We had recently moved, and I still felt uncomfortably out of place in our new town.

That’s when I noticed her, the petite blonde holding a cute, wavy-haired little boy who was happily pulling stickers out of eggs and putting them on his shirt and jeans.

I don’t remember exactly how we struck up a conversation, but Rebecca and I chatted comfortably from the get-go. We shared common ground as military wives new in town, and things just flowed easily from there. Before I packed up my tired kids and their Easter loot, she kindly invited our family over for dinner.

We were friends for a few months when God gave a cherry-on-top blessing by making us neighbors for almost three years before my family moved again.

Years later, both our families once again live in the same neighborhood. Her family moved here a year before mine, and for the first time we experienced what it was like to live in a new place with old friends.

People, it made all the difference.

I’m still surprised how God used that spring day and an open patch of grass to stage the beginning a favorite relationship. He arranges our futures in the most unsuspecting ways, doesn’t He? Every move we make and direction we follow has a purpose. Even if you are new in town, you are not out-of-place but comfortably and completely in His place.

Sometimes, just knowing this makes all the difference.

If you are sharing your own surprise or unexpected memory of spring, here are some things to remember:

1. New to link-up’s or have questions? Read this first.

2. Since we all dig surprises, please surprise another writer by leaving a comment on her post *or* by giving her a facebook shout-out or tweet. Use the hashtag: #outoftheblue.

3. Be sure to include the out of the blue banner {see below} in your post or link back to Chasing Blue Skies so your readers can join in the fun. That way, we can all easily find each other.

Next week’s prompt: How did God use a Scripture verse or passage to speak to you in a surprising or unexpected way?

<a href="http://chasingblueskies.net/?cat=47" title=""><img src="http://chasingblueskies.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/outoftheblue_final_draft_A.jpg" alt="" title="" style="border:none;" /></a>

Also, the winner of Alexandra Kuykendall’s book The Artist’s Daughter was Melissa! Congrats Melissa, and you should have already received an email from me!

May 9, 2013 4 Comments Filed Under: Friendship, Military

The Truth About Home and Moving Often

By Kristen

I haven’t lived in Oklahoma for eighteen years, but in many ways Oklahoma still lives in me.

It feels like home.

It’s funny how a place can seep so far into your bones you feel its soil fertilizing your heart long after its soil rests under your feet.

When I went to college forty miles from my childhood home, I assumed that if I met a boy, I would meet one with solid Oklahoma blood who had designs on staying put. As it turns out, I did meet a good Oklahoma boy, but he most definitely had no desire to stay put. So after he put a ring on my finger on a humid June evening, we packed up my grandma’s old orange and cream Chrysler Horizon and drove off into the sunset.

Or rather, to Ohio.

Goodbye, familiar surroundings. Hello, brand new everything.

To say I had a period of adjustment would be a gross understatement. Oh how I missed home, missed feeling like I belonged. But time turns new surroundings into familiar ones, and I learned much goodness existed beyond the borders of my home state.

I learned people without a southern accent are still nice folks.

I learned I can indeed survive a northern winter and a desert summer and all climates inbetween.

I learned I can be the first one to extend the hand of friendship.

I learned that comfort zones can be pushed not just seasonly or yearly, but daily.

I learned my worldview can and should exist beyond my driveway.

I learned every time the Lord brought our family to a new place, we were better off than in the old one.

And most importantly, I learned home is a Who, not a where.

Eighteen years later and several moves under my belt, it still shocks me to find much goodness exists beyond a goodbye. And no matter what, you can always go home again.

If you are sharing your own surprise goodbye story today, here are some things to remember:

1. New to link-up’s or have questions? Read this first.

2. Since we all dig surprises, please surprise another writer by leaving a comment on her post *or* by giving her a facebook shout-out or tweet. Use the hashtag: #outoftheblue.

3. Be sure to include the out of the blue banner {see below} in your post or link back to Chasing Blue Skies so your readers can join in the fun. That way, we can all easily find each other.

Next week’s prompt: Places. Tell me about a place that surprised you by how much you liked it. Write about how you didn’t expect to love it and why you now do. Maybe you live there now or hope to in the future. Maybe you vacationed there and hope to visit again. Either way, you were surprised at how the Lord softened your heart towards this location and how He’s used it to bless you. {And many thanks to Kristin Taylor for suggesting next week’s prompt!}

<a href="http://chasingblueskies.net/?cat=47" title=""><img src="http://chasingblueskies.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/outoftheblue_final_draft_A.jpg" alt="" title="" style="border:none;" /></a>

April 11, 2013 9 Comments Filed Under: Change, Military, out of the blue, waiting

When You Need Some Change Right Now Today

By Kristen

Excuse me for being a little down today, folks, but the last 24 hours have brought me some extreme weather whiplash and I am not. a. fan.

Snow in April: now, that just ain’t right. {But I’m gonna whisper this complaint because we’ve been known to get snow in May and - whimper - even early June.}

I know a lot of places like to claim the if-you-don’t-like-the-weather-then-wait-a-minute-it’ll-change mantra, but I’ve never lived anywhere that does this in style like Colorado.

On a similar but different note, we were supposed to move this summer, but it turns out we are officially staying put. So far, I’ve only experienced one downside to this change of events. When the calendar turns to a move year for our military family, Uncle Sam pretty much forces me to declutter. So while I know I have to do it myself this year like a big girl, I still need extra motivation to become the boss of my own drawers and closets.

Like a beacon of sunshine on a spring-winter day, Tsh’s Project Simplify gives me this motivation. With an approach much kinder and gentler than Uncle Sam’s, Tsh rallies her troops to declutter and organize one household hotspot per week for the month of April. This year, she encourages us to clean out neglected drawers and shelves, closets, piles, and unfinished projects. I am joining forces with her because in my book, it’s an easy way to do the before-the-move cleaning without having to, ya know, actually move.

Win – win!

Here are a couple pictures of two drawers, before and after. Most of the work was in going through lots of old papers and finding containers to better organize all the loose tape, glue, and other crafty things. {Hooray for saved shoe boxes!} The difference may not be profound, but my recycling bin is a whole lot fuller than it used to be. Also, because these drawers alone took less than an hour to go through, I am motivated to keep on cleaning.

Sometimes good change chisels it’s way slowly through months and years, one square inch at a time. Other times, good change happens faster than you can say holy blizzard in April.

Thank goodness.