What All Mamas Need to Hear

Dear Mama-Extraordinaire,

Yes, I’m talkin’ to you. First of all, you are a wonder, you know that? You, the one He hand-picked to hold, snuggle, love, and raise your babies. You mother your children better than any other woman could.

I’m in the thick of the inbetween season, although I hear the gallop of those teenage years louder and closer. As a mom sandwiched in the middle of the at-home parenting years, may I encourage you through a vow of sorts?

I vow to do my best to give you helpful encouragement.

If you’re a mom of littles, I vow not to approach you in the grocery and tell you to “enjoy these parenting years because they pass quickly and they are the best years of your life!” Because while this time does pass quickly, such comments are not helpful when your toddler has been giving you a run for your money since his sweet chubby feet hit the bedroom floor. I will tell you that while parenting will always have challenges, the challenges you deal with today will fade away. 

And when I am a mom of teenagers and you share your struggles with raising little people, I vow not to say, “You think this is hard? Ha! Just. You. Wait! ’til they’re teenagers!” Because while parenting teenagers holds unique challenges of its own, it is not helpful to overshare endless future parenting difficulties with bone-weary you. The teenage years seem a million miles away, and you want to know the struggles of today will ease. And they will.

And if you’re a mom of teenagers, I vow not to think you have it smooth sailing because your independent children give you breathing room. While you may have more alone time , this independence brings your chicks away from your safe nest and out in the big scary world. Lord have mercy, that alone is enough to drive you to your knees. And heaven knows you spend plenty of time there already, praying good sense and good choices prevail. You have your own sleepless nights, wondering if you’ve made the most of your time with them. To be sure, this season is no cakewalk. But the Lord was faithful to bring you through the earlier parenting seasons, and He will be faithful to see you through this one, too.

And if you’re a mom of tweens just like me, I vow not to play the who-has-it-harder game. In the end, it doesn’t matter how active your kid or how calm. How much he sleeps or how little. How strong-willed or compliant. Because while some kids are harder to raise than others, it is not helpful for you or me to play this game. And when you consider the parenting years from beginning to end {and on into adulthood}, we all pretty much get knocked to an even playing field. We need to circle up and look to each other for strength in our weaknesses, and in that our weaknesses become strengths.

And no matter your parenting season, don’t look left or right to gauge how you’re doing. Look up. Be quick to thank Him when things go well and quick to receive His grace when things don’t. Your Father in heaven chose you to mother your children. He has every confidence in you.

And so do I.

With much love and affection,

Kristen cheering-you-on Strong

 

I wrote this today in honor of the e-book publication of Mother Letters, a beautifully real and honest compilation of letters from beautifully real and honest mothers. These letters don’t only encourage but offer proof that we can do this messy but glorious mothering thing! Many thanks to Seth and Amber Haines for loving on us moms through this. Click on the picture below to order the e-book or click here to read more encouraging mother letters.


How You Can Really Rest This New Year

Happy New Year, darlings! I’ve missed you so much!

How did your holidays treat you? Good, I hope?

Ours treated us better than we deserve. Oh, it wasn’t perfect, but it was perfectly wonderful. It began on a hard note with our girl’s surgery to fuse her top two vertebrae together. While the days and hours leading up to surgery kept my stomach flip flopping, I can now say that being on the other side of it is pure joy. Still, you won’t waste a prayer on Faith, that her vertebrae behave by fusing like good little bones. We won’t know the final results for another month or two. So once again, we wait.

If there was a low spot to Christmas break {not including my sweet girl going under the knife}, it was yours truly pitching a fit over something the kids did wrong. {Nothin’ like pushing a situation from bad to worse by bringing in the F5 Mama emotions.} I gave them a talkin’ to that was overkill for the crime committed and when they tried to explain, I threw a, “Shut up!” right at them.

I continued my lecture ’til I looked over at my daughter with doe eyes swimming. ”Faith,” I said impatiently, “Why are you crying?”

She answered with her voice quivering, “Mama, you’ve {sniff, sniff}…never…told us {sniff, sniff}…to ‘shut up’… before.”

Well, there’s a first time for everything. If only I could know this would be my last. But I know myself and we haven’t even hit the teenage years.

I rub my forehead and look at them, trying to see Jesus in their faces. Sighing hard, I apologize for all the things I shouldn’t have said. Apologies don’t erase wounds, but they do treat them. Apologies aren’t magic wands that make things acceptable, but they are one tool that rebuilds what’s crumbled.

Apologies are one way to kick start a fresh start.

I love fresh starts, and heaven knows the New Year is the perfect time for one. Or if you’re like me, the perfect time for a dozen or so. And when we’ve got Jesus’ way about us, we remember that His grace is what hands us those fresh starts and do-overs allowing us to rest our heads in His peace.

Then suddenly I feel Him speak, “There really is a first time for everything.”

I rest in this truth.


For When Those Crazy Winds Blow


Fall in Colorado exudes magic. We’re on fall break here, so we’ve been able to ultra take it in.  The quivering aspen’s golden leaves are falling, but my fiery red maples’ leaves still hold on tight in spite of crazy winds.

Isn’t that what we parents do, hold on tight in spite of crazy winds? And it’s only when we cling to Hope we can soar on wings through those winds.

It’s been quite the week here at the Strong casa, each day proving my boys lay smack dab between childhood and young adulthood. How I adore them both, those anything-but-identical twins. They are the very best sons God could have given me, and I wouldn’t trade them for anything. I know the same is true for your kids, too. It’s no accident they are yours.

Still, parenting can feel two steps forward then ten steps backwards, walking on a tightrope. I remember miracles take time, change happens slowly, and progress occurs outside of my view. Still, the good-days-bad-days parenting pendelum swings and the crazy winds blow. So I hold on by a wing and a prayer.

And today, the Lord gave me *this* prayer, the one where He told me to pray for my children but replace the names of Israel {Jacob and Jeshurun, both other names for Israel} with my own name. So I say this out loud with ‘Kristen’ laced throughout:

“But now listen, O Jacob, my servant, Israel, whom I have chosen.

This is what the LORD says–he who made you, who formed you in the womb, and who will help you:

Do not be afraid, O Jacob, my servant, Jeshurun, whom I have chosen.

For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground;

I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessings on your descendants.

They will spring up like grass in a meadow, like poplar trees by flowing streams.” Isaiah 44:1-4

His promises of old are every bit as true for us today. Let this truth sink into your soul and refresh your spirit. Praying for you and your children as we hold onto Him Who won’t let go.

If you would like to get a little Blue Skies encouragement for free in your mailbox, just click here. You’re welcome to connect with me via Facebook, too!


Twelve

Within the past 72 hours, my tall-for-their-age boys turned 12 and started middle school. I thought these two little milestones might have me breathing in a paper bag. But I’m handling it well, thank you very much.

Of course, the day is still young.

Even though I know time sometimes changes history by glamorizing the good times while downplaying the exhausting ones, sometimes I look over my shoulder towards their younger years. Their wide-eyed-wonder at everything from balloons to bugs captivated me as much as them. Still, I enjoy these tween years and my kids are a total blast!

But when I saunter down memory lane, my mind’s eye sees life play out like a movie. I’m watching the scenes featuring my family. Sometimes I peek through my fingers because seeing mistakes played out is no picnic. Neither is looking at all those times I fretted over things that didn’t amount to a hill of beans. But then I’m shocked when several scenes show I didn’t blow it like I thought. {I bet the same is true for you, too!} And lo and behold, I actually did some things well, thank you very much.

Of course, they are still young.

I’m far from done raising my kiddos. No matter the age of children, there is something holy going on with growing kids: living, breathing grace in motion.There will be days I bomb parenting and days don’t. But through His goodness and grace, God holds all those days together and weaves them into a tapestry of beauty, into a good life story.

Happy Birthday, sweet boys. You may be twins, but you are uniquely gifted, individual brothers who just happened to be born at the same time. Thank you for bringing glorious color to our black-and-white world. Your Dad and I couldn’t possibly love you more.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...